The Shared Plan-Part 1

In recent blog posts, I've been writing about leading through emotion.  I've learned from books mentioned in those posts that people consider facts, but decide based on emotion.  As a result, I have decided to radically change how I try to influence people.  No longer will I develop a detailed proposal and try to sell it because, in my opinion, it's the most logical plan.  Instead, I have to master the art of engaging the feelings of those who I want to influence.

A key "handbook" for this work is Stomp the Elephant in the Office: Put an End to the Toxic Workplace, Get More Done -- and Be Excited About Work Again by Steven Vannoy and Craig Ross.  The authors give concrete guidelines for engaging people in a program by engaging their feelings.

I often feel frustrated because those I'm trying to influence "just don't get it" when I tell them how to fix an issue.  I feel as if the facts are on my side.  But my approach has been wrong.  In hindsight, I can't feel bad because the approach I've been using is the most common approach:

• ID the problem
• "Expert" develops a solution
• Tell people how to change
• Overcome resistance because nobody feels engaged

Instead of doing this I hereby resolve that, when I want to persuade people to do things--at home, at work, or in my community--I will cultivate what the authors call the "three conditions supporting change":

1. People feel good about themselves.
2. People's ideas are included.
3. People's motivations are included.

The authors provide concrete suggestions on how to reinforce these conditions.  I'll discuss some of these in future blog posts.  But the bottom line is that these conditions address emotions and, by doing so, they increase the odds that my teammates will own and support the plan.