Chris and I recently had a long, awkward discussion with a friend. I don't want to describe the personal details, but we felt she had made a huge mistake and had a chance to limit the damage from her action, but she would need to act quickly. We knew she would not want our feedback. But we care about her and want her to be successful. So we asked her to sit down and talk to us.
As we expected, it was uncomfortable for her and for us. All three of us couldn't wait for the conversation to end. But we felt compelled to give her feedback. We felt she was in denial about the situation and was headed to a repeat of the failures that have plagued her for a decade. We felt we could not let her off too easily, could not accept her excuses and rationalizations if we felt they were wrong--not if we really cared about her! We had to be honest, even though it was uncomfortable and we doubted that we were getting through to her.
Later, she told Chris that she had felt "attacked". I told Chris, "She wasn't attacked. Enemies attack. Friends confront."
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