Rose Colored Glasses

A little too much Oprah.  Too many Gratitude Journal entries.  Too much "positive psychology".  Count your blessings, look at the bright side, the glass is half full.

These are all good things.  This is real wisdom.  Optimism is better for health, better for success in life, better for happiness.  But sometimes I think I've been overtrained.  I can see the world through rose colored glasses, focusing so much on what is going well that I don't even acknowledge the things that are making me mad or sad.

I had quite a few days last week with vague feelings of "not quite right".  Discontent and frustration without being clear why.  Foggy discontent.

After a while, I realized I needed to "count my complaints" as well as my "blessings".  I definitely want to emphasize the positive.  I don't remember the ratios, but there are some magic things that happen when the ratio of positive comments versus negative comments in a relationship exceeds 2 to 1 or 3 to 1, or when positive thoughts outnumber negative thoughts by some magic number.  It's pretty clear that we're better off writing "Gratitude Journals" than we are writing "Complaint Journals".  But sometimes it helps to list those complaints. 

This morning, I brainstormed a bunch of things that were bugging me.  At home, at work, as a volunteer, with relatives, with my health, with the health of loved ones.  Things that feel unfinished, out of my control, things that seem to never seem to get much better.  And listing these things made it easier to understand some of the discontent I've been feeling in the last few days.  It was easier to shift my mood.  Ironically, listing my complaints made it easier to return to gratitude.