Relaxed Urgency

Does stress improve performance?  In combat, yes.  In competitive sports, yes.  But I’m not a soldier and I’m not an athlete.

I’m working to replace stress with “relaxed urgency”.  I want to be someone who surprises people with all the things I can accomplish at home, at work and in my community, who meets challenging deadlines, but who remains calm and relaxed most of the time.  Someone who hurries without looking hurried.  Someone who gets things done quickly but with a serene expression, a ready smile, and with arms, shoulders, and legs loose and limp like a rag doll.

I see a lot of people at work who seem very relaxed, but who lack urgency.  That’s  relatively easy to do, but it doesn’t lead to peak performance.  I see a few others, however, that seem to have mastered “relaxed urgency”.  Their output is prolific and they almost always seem poised and calm.

“Relaxed urgency” doesn’t come naturally to me.  This is why I’ve changed all my meditation practice to focus on relaxation, and why I’ll even take short relaxation meditation breaks at work.  If I want to master “relaxed urgency”, I have to consciously loosen my muscles at work and at home, many times a day.

Why replace stress-driven urgency with relaxed urgency?  First of all, stress is bad for health.   Stress is a response to any perceived threat.  It can be true physical danger, but it can also be something that can’t really hurt me, such as fear of criticism if I miss a deadline at work.  And as soon as the mind perceives a threat, the primitive part of the brain—the part we share with all animals—assumes control of the mind.  It focuses on the threat, raises heart rate, raises blood pressure, and releases adrenaline and cortisol hormones.  These physical changes are all very harmful.

In addition, stress won’t help me reach my goals.  Adrenaline and a fast heart rate will help me respond to a threat with fight or flight.  They help me in combat and in competitive sports.  But I can’t fight a deadline, and I can run away from it either.  Also, stress interferes with thinking and creativity.  I’ve read that the primitive part of the brain says to the neo-cortex—the thinking part of the brain—“We’re under attack, and I’ve got this.  You’re much too slow to deal with a threat.  We need the lightning fast reactions of the animal brain to deal with danger.”  So, when I’m under stress, I lose much of my ability to analyze information, develop options, and make rational choices.  I lose precisely the part of my brain I need most to address daily challenges.

Finally, stress interferes with social skills.  It causes me to hyper-focus on deadlines, on problems, and to react emotionally without thinking.  Relaxation, on the other hand, allows me listen better, to think of possible consequences before I speak or act.  Whether I’m at work or home with my family, a relaxed state is far better for all my social interactions.

Deliberate relaxation of my muscles, by itself, will not lead to my vision of relaxed urgency.  It is also vital to carefully manage my commitments, my priorities, my daily goals, and to ensure I’m living in harmony with my values.  But even if I do a perfect job of setting goals and making plans, I can still stress out unless I frequently close my eyes, scan my body for tension, and breathe.