It's at the Tip of My Nose

What is the secret to meditating on my breath when I'm feeling distracted?  It's at the tip of my nose.

Sometimes when I try to meditate on my breathing, my attention jumps between how breathing causes movement in my belly, movement in my chest, and other movements and sensations.  I can't seem to settle my focus anywhere.  And then I can't help but try to control my breath.  I know that, ideally, I just let the breath happen naturally while I observe it.  But I can't help trying to control it.  In particular, I can't help trying to breathe more slowly and deeply because this seems more "spiritual".  All this control and wandering attention prevents me from getting into a rewarding, deep concentration on my breath.

What can I do at a time like this?  I often find that it helps to focus on the breath coming in and out of my nose.  Make that the primary focus of my breathing meditation.  If my attention shifts to chest or belly, gently return to the nose.  I find that this makes me less judgmental about HOW I'm breathing.  If I just feel the air enter and leave the tip of my nose, I'm not overlerly concerned with whether I'm "doing it right".  I'm more inclined to breathe naturally.  I'll still feel the breath in my lungs and diaphragm but I let the feelings in my nose take center stage.  I find this so much easier that I can do it not only during focused meditation but also when doing other things like driving to work or walking the dogs.

Best Wishes for All

My favorite meditation of late is to wish for myself and others, "May you be healthy, be happy, and may you manifest your goals."

I start with myself because if you don't love yourself, then you don't love anyone.  Put on your own mask before helping others.

Then I think of family, close friends, and my dogs.  May my dogs manifest their dreams.  Dreams of going for a walk, sniffing everything other dogs have marked, dreams of playing, treats, and of human companionship.

Then I think of people at work that I expect to interact with on this day.  May they be healthy and happy.  May their deepest wishes for their family and their future come true.  Lastly, I think of people who have upset me because this promotes forgiveness which is good for me.

That ends the morning meditation, but I've developed a habit of continuing these thoughts in almost every interaction I have throughout the day.  In meetings.  In social events.  Or just walking around the office, seeing people in their cubicles, and silently wishing them well.

People can tell.  They don't hear my thoughts, but they seem to feel them.  My meetings go more smoothly than before I developed this habit.  I'm less intimidated when asking higher ups for approval or when stating an unpopular opinion.  I have had a tendency to be skeptical of authority figures I don't know well.  I'm sure they can sense that skepticism and it hasn't helped me gain their support.  But when I silently wish them and their families and friends all the best they could hope for, I find myself trusting their judgment more, giving them the benefit of the doubt, and I sense that they, too, grow in their trust of me, my ideas, and my intentions.