Meditating Behind the Wheel

Doesn't seem like a good idea, does it?  I feel a need to meditate twice per day.  In the morning, before the whirlwind demands of the day, I need that time when I say, "Just for now, I don't need to do anything."  During this time, I can see the world as it is without trying to control it.  It prepares me to then plunge into my projects without taking my goals so seriously.  And I need this again late in the day when I've been striving to accomplish things for so long that I need to be reminded again that I don't need to change things, don't need to control.

But when to find the time?  I've always wished that, occasionally, I could take advantage of my commute.  Can I meditate while driving?  "Take a deep breath and close your eyes."  Not a good idea, huh?

But mindfulness meditation provides an option.  This is the kind of meditation in which I notice whatever is going on in my mind and body without trying to change things.  The tension in my fingers, wrists, forearms and shoulders as I grip and turn the steering wheel.  I can't do it safely, but I know it would feel better to let my arms drop to the side and relax.  But the point in mindfulness meditation is to notice exactly how things are, to notice for example which muscles are tense and which are loose, without trying to change anything.

I notice my thoughts about what other drivers are doing and how I should react.  I notice thoughts come up about work, but I remind myself not to dwell on them.  Don't have a prolonged internal dialogue.  Two or three sentences at most and then move on.  For those thoughts that keep coming back, I'll look closely at the emotion that fuels their persistence.  Is it anxiety?  A desire to please someone?  Guilt?  Is it just something I enjoy doing?

To help me remember to stay focused, I turned again this morning to my favorite creator of iPhone meditation apps, Meditation Oasis.  Here's a link to their website:   meditationoasis.com.  I wrote about one of their apps recently in this post:  guru-in-my-iphone.  For the drive, I chose their app called "Take a Break".

This app is designed to be used when taking a break at work.  Knowing that you might listen to the app while sitting at your cubicle, the guide doesn't tell you to relax and close your eyes. She just guides you to notice  things without trying to change them.   Your brain shifts from the goal oriented left brain to the experience oriented, carefree, intuitive right brain.  And this morning, the 13 minutes of meditation took me from the parking lot of my hotel to the parking lot at work.

Guru on a Leash

My dogs can also be my gurus.  When I meditate, I want to give my left brain a break.  I want, for 15 minutes a day, twice a day, to stop looking back at the past or forward to the future.  I want to, instead, let my right brain take over.  I want to let this part of my brain take control of me--this part of my brain that simply observes, that has no goals, that just tunes into to the whatever is happening in my mind, my body, my emotions, my surroundings.

My dogs can help me let go of my goals.  Their minds are free of language so that all they can do is focus on the sun on their bodies, the smells and sounds around them, the touch of their owner.  They only know the present moment.  This makes them like a person who has shifted his or her awareness to the non-verbal, present-centered, carefree right brain.

When my dogs are with me during meditation, I find it easier to follow their lead and just notice whatever is happening inside and outside of my body.  They are my meditation partners, and at times I feel that they can sense the difference in my energy when I'm meditating and want to hang out with me at these times.  They seem to understand what I'm doing, or, perhaps more accurately, they recognize that I'm FINALLY understanding what they've been doing all along.

A Guru in my iPhone

For the last week, I've used just one meditation iPhone App:  "Simply Being" by Meditation Oasis.  It's like having a guru in my iPhone.  The woman who guides this meditation, whoever she is, totally gets the concept of "mindfulness"--of observing calmly whatever thoughts, feelings, and sensations pop into your mind.  It's so hard to do--a skill that meditators cultivate for decades--but she (whoever she is) makes it sound so easy and natural.

In other blog posts, I've described different iPhone apps that I'm fond of using for meditation ("relax--there's an app for that" and "hypnotized meditation").  But if I had to pick just one app, this would be the one.

The "Simply Being" app first asks me to set aside all goals for the time of the meditation, to let go of all projects, deadlines, obligations, and responsibilities.  This is the ONLY way that the planning, worrying, goal oriented left brain can temporarily release it's grip on my thoughts and my attention so that I can tune into "useless" things such as sensations in my stomach, chest, back, throat, and nose when I inhale and exhale.

The narrator intuitively repeats this suggestion often enough to keep me focused but not so often as to annoy me.

Further, she guides me to accept, without a fight, the thoughts that pop into my head.  Notice them.  But don't let them turn into prolonged "conversations".  I find, when I do this, that the thoughts that pop up often reveal the most important issues that I need to resolve later, when the meditation is over.  As long as I don't dwell on the thoughts, I just learn something about what is REALLY bugging me without getting so caught up in the thoughts that I lose touch with the rest of the meditation experience.

The narrator also guides me to get comfortable and relaxed, but then to observe whatever physical sensations I feel--pleasant or unpleasant.  I think the unpleasant sensations are often the most important sensations to observe.  When I notice an itch, tension in my legs, shallowness in my breathing, soreness in my right shoulder, or any other unpleasant feeling, and I don't DO anything to change the sensation--when I lay still and accept the itch or the muscle tension--this deepens my perception of subtle bodily sensations.  there have been times in the last week, for example, that I would notice aches or hunger and then would focus on my breathing and heartbeat and actually feel my pulse in my hands, stomach, face, legs, and chest all at once along with the rising and falling of belly and chest with each breath. It felt good, and when the meditation was over, I had a shift in my visual perception of light and color for several hours--not distorted, just more appreciative of light coming in through the windows and bringing out the colors of whatever it touched.

Finally, the narrator guides me to notice emotions.  This happens anyway as I observe thoughts and bodily sensations.

The narrator keeps reassuring me that wherever my mind wanders, as long as I notice the wandering, I'm "doing" the meditation correctly, that it is all "part of the meditation" and that it is all the "perfect" way for the meditation to unfold.

I sense that the designer's of the app kept in mind Buddha's best known teaching about "mindfulness" meditation.  Buddha taught that, when being mindful, we should tune into body, mind, and emotion, noticing what happens whether it is pleasant or unpleasant, and thus learning the reality of our changing selves.  Similarly, in this app, wherever the mind wanders is OK as long as the wandering is observed.

I find that repeating the use of the app, day after day, does not get boring.  She is a very skilled guide for meditation, a guru in my iPhone.  In the last few weeks, using this app, I have been having some of the deepest meditation experiences that I've had in 30 years.

An Architect's Eyes

For the last few weeks, I've had the privilege of receiving private lessons in architecture from Walter Langsam, retired professor of Architectural History at the University of Cincinnati.  This year, I became the co-chair of the "Clifton House Tour" fundraising event which will occur on Mother's Day, May 13, 2012.  It is a lot of work, but one of the great rewards is that I've had an opportunity to see, even if it is only a blurred and vague image, what Professor Langsam sees when he looks at the 10 homes that will be on the "Clifton House Tour".  I have at least an idea of what he sees when he takes in these homes whose history spans more than half of the history of the United States.  The oldest home was built in the 1840's.  The newest was built in the last 3 years.

The homes on the tour will remain secret until the day of the tour.  Kudos to you if you can figure out the homes based soley on the pictures in this blog posting.

We arrived at the home shown above just as the sun was beginning to set.  Walter pointed out that the home still has the original red mortar.  He said that this mortar doesn't hold up as well as other mortars.  He was pleasantly surprised that the owners continued to maintain the red mortar over the years, rather than replacing it with another style that would hold up better but would not be true to the original architectural design.  To paraphrase Dr. Langsam, "Oh my!  Don't the colors look SO WARM at sunset?  Don't they glow?"  I saw exactly what he meant.  The mortar was beautiful in the warm sunset colors.  I could not imagine the HORROR if the mortar had been replaced with any other color.  I saw how all the oranges, tans, and browns lit up in the late day sun.  I wanted to stay on the porch forever.

I entered the home with Dr. Langsam and he pointed out detail after detail.

In other homes, Walter and the homeowners provided more contemporary images and insights.

Touring these homes with Professor Langsam has given me new insights into architectural design.  I see with  new eyes.  I walk down the streets of my beloved Clifton neighborhood, with its homes that span the last 170 years of American history, and I notice details I never noticed before.  These are new connections between neurons in my brain, and I'm grateful to Professor Langsam, grateful for what I've learned and the new pleasures I enjoy when I walk down the street.